Can YOU forgive?
Warning: The following blog is pretty much rated PG-13, or maybe even R. Sorry, I just feel like sometimes real-life lessons need real-life examples. If you can't deal with it, click here to go to another site: www.disney.com
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Can you forgive?
Oh, sure you can.
"Back in college, my best friend, Margaret, screwed my boyfriend behind my back. But, I forgave her. We're not really friends anymore, though."
BULL CRAP. I mean, can you REALLY FORGIVE?
Webster's defines the word "forgive" as: "to give up resentment of or claim to requital for; to grant relief from payment of ; to cease to feel resentment against (an offender)"
So, based on even the WORLD'S VIEW of "forgiveness," we see that it means to "give up resentment", or in other words, "to not hold a grudge."
So, let me throw out a few examples (some based on actual incidents I know of, and some purely fictional), and just ask yourself, could I forgive the person in each of these examples? I mean, could I really look past it, assuming they showed some remorse and sorrow for their actions, and love them with the same love that Jesus showed?:
You catch your spouse shooting up heroin in the bathroom. They repent, go to Rehab, but a year later, they get arrested for having marijuana in the car (with your toddler in the back seat).
Your spouse cheats on you, repents for it, but several years later they get caught with their pants around their ankles with their secretary in the break room at work?
A drunk driver hits your car, killing one of your children. He goes to jail, and then asks your forgiveness for what he did?
You catch your spouse looking at teen porn on the internet. They apologize and you think all is well, but then you catch them doing it again a few months later?
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I just finished reading "Redeeming Love" by Francine Rivers. It is based loosely on the Biblical story of Hosea, which paraphrased is: The story of a man named Hosea, who is ordered by God to marry a hooker. She screws around, leaves, cheats on him, basically acts like a giant whore, but yet he keeps loving her, and taking her back. The story is basically an example of what the country of Israel kept doing to God, but yet his undying love and devotion kept His arms wide open, and kept Him loving the people of Israel.
In the fictional book, God tells "Michael" to marry a specific prostitute, named Angel. He married her, takes her home, but yet she leaves him time and again. There is a deeper rooted problem to her unfaithfulness, caused partially by her rape at the age of 6, being forced into prostitution, and some serious psychological trauma. Angel leaves Michael at one point, feeling incapable of loving him properly, the way he deserves. She doesn't know HOW to love! But yet, time and again, he takes her back, because God instructs him not to give up on her.
Could I do this? Could YOU do this?
I guess what you have to ask yourself is this, "Is there anything that ANYONE has done to me that is really that much worse than what we did to Jesus?"
I mean, he was rejected, spit upon, took ALL of our sins upon himself, died a horrible gruesome death for us, and he did it ALL out of love?
He took ALL of our sins upon Himself.
Remember that time you cheated on a History test in high school? He took that one.
Remember that time you embezzled from work? He took that one.
Remember that time you got drunk on a business trip and cheated on your wife? He took that one.
Remember that time you looked at porn on the internet late at night when no one was watching? He took that one.
Remember that time you smacked the crap out of one of your kids (or even your spouse) out of anger? He took that one.
Remember that time you got pulled over for speeding and got a ticket? He took that one.
Does this mean that sin is without punishment? Absolutely not. But is it OUR RIGHT to punish and to judge, or is it our OBLIGATION to forgive?
Do we as humans have any right to hold any resentment towards a fellow man when they wrong us, considering that what we did to Christ was so much worse?
Is there any limit on how many times you should forgive? In Matthew 18:22, Jesus is responding to Peter's question about how many times he has to forgive a person, and He says, "Seventy times Seven." That's about 490 times. I think the point is, as long as someone is repentant, keep forgiving.
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So, maybe there's someone out there today that you need to seek forgiveness from. Or maybe there's someone out there that you need to forgive. Or maybe someone that you say you've forgiven, but you need to LET GO of the resentment and bitterness.
Or maybe you're OK with the whole forgiveness "business", and have learned to forgive as Christ did. But, then again, deep down inside, are you REALLY?
Are you REALLY prepared for the next time that someone does you wrong? Maybe it will be someone close to you. Maybe it will be one of those "unforgivable sins." Can you forgive it anyhow?
Love it! I am not really sure how or why I ended up here reading this today, but the funny thing is, God has been working in me this very thing. I can't really say I have forgiven something if I am holding on to bitterness. I have also learned, when I truly want to let it go, even when it seems too hard, when I ask him to take it for me, He is so good, He always does.
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Hey Dusty, I was just offered the gift of forgiveness from a person that is very hard and bitter and I was one of the contributors to her feeling that way, I know it was all God. He gave me the words and amazingly they where heard. I have been blogging a bit lately on myspace, yeah I know I only joined because of my daughter. I miss our talks brother.
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